


These Boots Were Made for Walking

by iamthechickenqueen



Category: Amazingphil - Fandom, Danisnotonfire - Fandom, Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Video Blogging & YouTube RPF
Genre: Crack, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-10
Updated: 2014-01-10
Packaged: 2018-01-08 06:46:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1129571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iamthechickenqueen/pseuds/iamthechickenqueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After realising his flat mate and crush, Phil, has a 'thing' for knee-high leather boots, Dan takes drastic action to get his attention</p>
            </blockquote>





	These Boots Were Made for Walking

Dan had a crush. A crush that he could never tell anyone about because it was on his best friend, and flat mate, Phil.

One morning, or rather afternoon, when Dan had just woken up he walked into the lounge of their apartment and found Phil sitting on the sofa with his laptop. A generic TV programme was on in the background, but he wasn't really watching. After the two had exchanged "Good morning"s, and laughed after glancing towards the clock, Dan slumped down next to Phil and reached over him for the remote.

Phil didn't even glance up. He was completely absorbed in his laptop and Dan couldn't help but feel a little jealous of the cats dancing on the screen. He wanted attention from Phil, but he pushed those longing thoughts to the back of his mind and started to flip through the channels.

He soon realised there was nothing good on, and left the TV on another generic programme whilst he went to fetch his own laptop from his bedroom. When he returned, however, Phil's attention was no longer on the dancing cats (or whatever he had found on tumblr). He was staring avidly at the TV screen, not realising he was even doing it.

Again, Dan felt a pang of jealousy at the fact that something else had grabbed Phil's attention. The 'thing' in question was a group of women, all dressed in knee-high leather boots.

Several minutes passed, both men looking at the screen - Phil in admiration and Dan in longing - until Phil suddenly realised what he was doing, and also the fact that Dan was standing right there witnessing it. His face turned a delicate shade of red and he silently turned back to his laptop.

But Dan did not think badly of Phil. In fact, his thoughts were somewhere else completely.

Phil is never usually like that because of women... It must have been those leather boots...

Later that day Dan left the apartment, for the first time in three days, with thoughts from that morning still playing in his head. He walked for a while down the busy streets of London, peering through shop windows on a quest to find some decent clothes.

The look of awe on his face. I wish he looked at me like that

Suddenly a man bumped into him and yelled "Watch what you're doing!"

He had been standing still in the middle of a particularly busy street. He was so deep in thought he hadn't even realised, just as Phil had not realised he was staring at the women earlier in the day. It wasn't until Dan came back to reality that he acknowledged he was standing and staring in through the window of a shoe shop - a women's shoe shop.

He was puzzled. Why had his feet stopped him here? He examined the shop window curiously, when his eyes locked onto a pair of knee-high leather boots. They looked just like the ones the alluring girls had been wearing on TV. An image, the same image that had been pestering him all day, flashed across his eyes; the look on Phil's face when he had seen those boots.

And all of a sudden Dan had a new urge. A new thought pushing against his brain that he just couldn't get rid of. It was ridiculous, but he couldn't shake it away.

He needed those boots.

Forty-five minutes later and Dan walked out of the shoe shop with a bag swinging from his hand. It had been the most humiliating and degrading thing he had ever done, but he couldn't help but smile as he walked back down the busy street to call a cab to take him back to his apartment. Back to Phil. He couldn't wait to show them off, and see the look on Phil's face when he walked into his bedroom wearing them. Tight, high-heeled - he wouldn't be able to resist. His eyes would wander from the dancing tumblr cats and finally rest on him, Dan.

A thought stopped him in his tracks - he didn't know how to walk in them yet.

Sure, he had tried them on in the shop for size (whilst the woman helping him spluttered a "sorry" before running off to go and cry with laughter in the store room), but he knew that he couldn't actually walk in them yet. He didn't want to make a fool of himself in front of Phil.

So he paused for thought, and made the decision to practise on a less busy street. He could hardly practise back at home as that was where Phil was, and he wanted it to be a surprise.

Soon he found a street only a few people were using and stopped to put on the boots that would capture Phil's lust-filled gaze.

It was only a minute later that Dan found he had a new appreciation for women. How did they walk in these things? Step after step he tottered along. He felt as though he was learning to walk all over again, and he supposed his height wasn't helping with his balance. Anyone watching him would have thought he resembled a hideous chicken-lizard hybrid, with his arms bending out at strange angles and his spine bent, as he continued to stumble along.

Ten minutes later, and a glance down at his feet told him he was becoming more stable. Maybe soon he would be able to master the art of 'strutting'. He imagined Phil would like to see him wiggling his hips whilst he swept into his bedroom and stood looking down at him from the foot of his bed.

"OH MY GOD IT'S DANISNO-"

A fan girl, who no doubt was ready to come rushing towards him after spotting him on the street, stopped in her tracks. She was stunned. He idol, and biggest ever crush, was attempting to parade down the street in a pair of six-inch heels.

Dan, realising this must be weird for her, acted as though there was nothing unusual about the situation and went over to say hello.

After taking a few pictures with the girl (he had a look at them and was surprised to see how good he looked in those boots) he decided he was ready to finally get Phil's attention...

A quick text to Phil told Dan that he was at home. Everything was in place for his plan. On his way back he had gone through a few things in his head that might make him appear even more alluring to Phil whilst wearing the leather boots.

When he entered the apartment he encountered something that hadn't crossed his mind - stairs. He hadn't had a chance to practice going up stairs, especially this many, but he thought if he just went slowly and tried to be quiet he would be okay. He was wrong.

A misjudgment of steps caused him to trip and face-plant the floor of the apartment's hallway.

"Dan?" He heard Phil call. "Is that you? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine" he called back as he hastily tried to pull himself up and regain his posture. This wasn't the start he had hoped for. Luckily Phil hadn't come running and Dan was able to use this situation to his advantage. He could now locate where Phil was in the apartment from where his voice had come from. He was in the lounge.

Slowly Dan made his way into the room and leaned against the doorway, smirking down at Phil who was again sitting on the sofa watching tumblr cats. Man, does he ever get tired of those tumblr cats?

Dan had anticipated that Phil's gaze would fall on him and he wouldn't be able to look back to anything else. The unusual clicking noise of the heels on the wooden floor had caused Phil to glance up, and when his eyes caught a hold of Dan, his prediction came true. He could look at nothing else.

"So, what do you think?" Dan spoke as he shuffled one of his leather-clad feet against the floor.

"I..." Phil looked slightly more worried than Dan had hoped. "What... Are those boots?"

Dan pushed himself upright using the door frame and carefully put one foot in front of the other until he reached the arm of the sofa. He sat down on it and crossed his legs. The boots were waving in Phil's face. At that point he wished he was also wearing a miniskirt as this position would have shown off his legs beautifully.

Phil was horrified.

But the adrenaline that was pumping through Dan's veins meant he didn't recognise the look on Phil's face and he continued with his plan. He leaned his head back slightly and stuck his chest out, just the way he had seen so many slutty girls do before. He now realised why they did it. He turned his face back to Phil as he waited for him to speak. To tell him that he was the sexiest thing he had ever laid eyes on.

Phil said nothing, but started to shuffle his body down the sofa slightly, away from Dan. This movement was hard to miss and Dan suddenly realised that his plan wasn't going, well, to plan. He slipped off of the arm of the sofa and into the space Phil had just vacated, leaning into him as he whispered:

"I saw you this morning. I know how leather boots turn you on"

Phil swallowed uncomfortably as he looked down at Dan's legs. He knew many people had commented on how Dan had legs many teenage girls lusted over, but he couldn't shake the fact that he was sitting next to this fully grown man wearing high-heeled leather boots.

Dan took the initiative to take Phil's hand and place it upon his leg.

It was at this point that another pair of leather boots entered the room. Wearing them was Internet sensation Chris Kendall, or Crabstickz.

It was now Dan's turn to be shocked. "Phil... Wha-?"

"I'm sorry Dan. Me and Chris, well, we're kind of an item."

Chris walked over in his boots, much more gracefully than Dan had done, and sat himself down on Phil's lap.

"You were right, leather boots do turn me on, but Chris just wears them so much better"

Dan was distraught, his heart broken. He jumped up and ran from the room, stumbling again and throwing himself at the wall by accident.

He ran, ran out of the apartment and down the street until he ended up in a place he had never been before. It was dark now and the area looked quite rough.

"Hey sexy!" A man called, appearing from an alley way. "How much for you?"

The strange man thought Dan was a prostitute. The leather boots' allure wasn't good enough for Phil, but this man was enticed. Dan knew he couldn't go back home to Phil, not after the heartbreak. He had nothing to lose...

Three months later and Dan was the most sought-after prostitute in the whole of London.

The End


End file.
